Katie T

Hey Ian and Anthony if you're reading this, I just want to say thank you so much. And this statement is practically speaking for every single smosher out there that you saved. We just want you to know that you're more than a comedy duo with original funny videos and a great sense of humor.

You're a lifesaver.

I guess my story started not to long ago. I was in 4th grade, ya I know I was young

That was when I started to realize people didn't think of me as much as they used to.

The thing about me is, I'm different. Very different. I like all different things, when usually people only focus on one main thing in life. I've loved being different, but sometimes I almost forced myself to forget everything I loved. To be like everyone else. To be normal.

I'm glad I didn't.

I loved country music and I played guitar. I got made fun of everyday because of that. It was like people couldn't stand other kids who weren't like them. The insults were light now, not to bad, but enough to get me a little heartbroken. The people who I thought were my friends just sorta...stopped being my friends. They just drifted away, started worrying about being "popular" and all the things you shouldnt care about.

I also dressed differently. It was weird. By then kids were wearing shoulder less tops and short shorts. Kids were wearing shirts from forever21 and urban outfitters that my family couldn't even afford. I didnt like clothes like that, I felt uncomfortable showing off my shoulder or stomach. I was bold though.

I was wearing dresses. Yeah, casual dresses because I wanted to. I didn't wanna grow up, I didn't want to be like the others. People laughed at me. On a regular basis my outfit would either be a dress with sleeves and jeans under it. People also made fun of me when I wore a tee shirt and jeans when I was lazy. I didn't think it mattered what you wore, I thought it mattered who you were.

Fourth grade came to an end, and my summer was crazy. My good friend became almost like a 7th grader. She was tall and skinny, only weighed 65 pounds for being 5' 4" for gods sake. She started wearing makeup, when I still liked to wear hoodies and jeans. She lied to me, and stole one of my only good down to earth friends.

I was left with nothing.

Also the idea of dating started, and being me with extremely frizzy curly brown hair and glasses I was almost the ONLY one not doing it. It was like I was invisible.

Summer ended with me just up in my room alone watching YouTube for the first time. Everything was pretty funny, I decided once school started I would watch it more.

A good decision that changed me.

By fifth grade, it got even worse. It's almost as bad as where I stand now. Kids get mean in fifth grade. Really self centered and mean.

I started love the Internet as well. YouTube always made me laugh for some crazy reason, but when I showed it to my friends, they just thought it was stupid. I didn't know why. It was funnier than them. When I started watching more of YouTube, the less I was with them. I was starting to be bullied because of it.

By then, I started to write a lot too. I would learn to write by reading, so I was considered a need aswell. Everything bit by bit fell apart. I was so young I didn't realize it. My new friends once again...disappeared. It was throwing everything away. I had honestly sat with them everyday, but they would get up...and move. I sad alone with one other girl and a shy boy who kept to himself. That was all.

Sometimes, I would just sit in my room and cry all night. My life was a mess. I would sit staring out the window, listening to depressing songs because I couldn't do anything else. I just had to embrace the fact that I was alone. But one point I realized I had been doing that for a year. It was all to much. Nothing was getting better.

It even came to the point where I was sitting in the bathtub. And I thought "What if I just laid here..forever?" I slipped myself underwater and tried everything. In short, I tried killing myself.

I realized I shouldn't be stupid though, so I never went through with it. But one day, someone made up painful rumors about me that weren't true. Not even realistic. Nobody talked to me anymore. The only guy I really knew now was a blonde boy on the bus who liked the Internet too. That's all my REAL friends.

No one helped me. There was only one thing left to do.

That's the point where I cut myself off from everyone in reality.

And in the end I was glad I did.

I started just going on the Internet, spending countless hours up in my room listening to or even writing music. One day I got a call. A guy friend of mine(the bus kid) wanted to come over. Being socially awkward and excited me, I said yes.

That's the day my life changed.

Let's just say this boy helped save me. No, I didn't like him or find him attractive. He was a great friend.

After awhile of just laughing in the woods we went inside because it was cold. I started to think how he was my only friend. Yeah, pathetic.

"Ughhh, I'm depressed." I said to him.

He smiled at me and went on my laptop. He didn't even say why! But I followed, because anything could cheer me up.

He showed me a video by smosh. Im sorry I can't remember, I was so happy that day it was all a blur. Totally random video. But it changed me so much.

I laughed hard, for the first time in years. The way Ian shouted and the way Anthony laughed was just heartwarming to me. The boy showed me more, like all the "If ___ were real" and Boxman and some LTwS. I felt happy. It was a weird feeling to me, but I liked it.

After he went home, I watched more.

For that one night, I slept well. I didn't cry once before going to bed, I didn't stay up (as) late anymore. The one exception to staying up late was watching more videos.

I quickly caught on to smosh. I learned their names, watched hidden videos on Anthony's channel and started to talk about them to anyone I could talk to. A lot.

The pain outside of smosh didn't just stop though. It got worse.

People REALLY started to make fun of me. They just said I was that girl who spent all her time in her basement on the computer. Swear words. Nerd. Loser. Any possible insult.

But when I went home, instead of crying, I either looked for the new smosh episode or re-watched old ones. They helped me smile when i just felt like there was nothing else to live for.

And basically nothing else has happened from then except people outside from smosh got worse.

But smosh for me, just got better.

I met Corey on tinychat, who always makes me laugh. I loved tinychat, although I don't know a lot of you TCers because of my broken webcam but I plan to get to know you, maybe. I know all of you smoshers are great people, I would love to get to know you more. You guys just help me forget everything else in life.

I met a couple hardcore smoshers who actually took time to talk to me, who had the same common interests as I did and understood me.

And I met people who respected me for who I am. Who didn't think I was weird for always being on the computer, or always talking about the things I love instead if hiding them.

I did this through twitter, but the main reason I know all these people is smosh. So yeah....thanks. I literally wouldn't be here if it wasn't for you.

So that's my story. Im sorry it's so long and it barely talks about smosh but it needs to be said. I've been wanting to get this out for ages. And reading other entries, I know Im not the worst. But we all have one thing in common.

Smosh has saved us. Thank you Smosh.

Because my survival is based around them. They are my reason to live.

So Ian, Anthony, if you're reading this, I want you to know the motto I've been living by since the day I've known about you. And this applies to me every single day, every moment I feel alone.

"People haven't always been there for me, but smosh has."

Cece

Hi, I'm Cece. I'm 13, I've been a Smosher for almost an entire year, and this is my story. Ever since the Third Grade, Ive always bee different than the average girl. I wasn't like the preps or the jocks or the shy ones. I was never labeled. And being different, cause lots of problems. Especially in the Fifth Grade. I was bullied. They would laugh at me, tease me, push me around, while the teachers just watched, and did nothing. I would come home everyday, crying, wondering why me, what was wrong with me. I had no friends. That was the first time I experienced depression, and Ive been going in and out of it ever since.

Sixth Grade when by in a blur. I was teased for dressing like a nerd (I had no idea wtf I was doing in sixth grade) and being the smallest one in the class. I was so glad when i was summer, so I could hang out wit my best friend Quesi. She understood me, knew me. She was like my sister. I loved her so much.

Then, the worst happened. On July,10,2010, Quesi died. i don't like to get into details. I was devastated. I had no one. Absolutely on one, it seemed. It was then, in 7th grade, I became suicidal. I almost did it once, I was about to plunge the knife in my heart, when something stopped me. I don't know what it was, i just, had this voice in my head. It told me to hold on, that I was going to find something amazing. Somethign that would change my life forever, to hold on. I did not die that day. That summer, I saw my first Smosh video.

It was confusing at first. I didn't know how I came across the video. i now know it was destiny. The video was "First Person Shooters Suck" I remember that first night just clicked video after video. i was hooked. I officially declared myself a Smosher around September. But I didn't learn about the fan base until about December. That day I will never forget. I was on Tinychat. I met Brandi(@Smosher_Branday), Katie(@itscuzimbrown),another Kate (@NeonSassie) and so many others but I cant remember off the top of my head right now. It was amazing. Knowing that alll these people felt exactly the way I felt. It was AWSOME! But then, reality hit again when I fell into depression once again in January. i don't know why I get so depressed, i really dont. It just happens. I started to cut,soon after. Some of my Smosher friends found out and tried helping me. They actually care. And because of you guys, i have vowed to never try to kill myself again,and I'll try my best not to cut again. More importantly, Smosh, and all you Smoshers, saved my life. I' so grateful for all of you caring. Thank you so much. xoxoxox <3

Smosh:

Thank you for looking at this blog!

Dahlia

Ian and Anthony, if you happen to be reading this, I want you to know that you guys are the reason I'm still alive today. If you hadn't been there when I scrolled down the Youtube homepage, I might still be depressed, still dead inside or dead on the outside. You make me feel like I can be myself and do anything. And coming from me, that's reeeeeally saying something. You make me laugh, cry, fangirl and sing along and repeat lines. You make me smile and feel like I'm worth something. Even though you guys are a comedy duo. You just make me feel amazing. Now, though this story may seem somewhat long, please read it. I'd like to know that you know I'm here in the millions of faces of fans you have. Pleeeeease just read on. It'll be worth it. Just know that I love you guys.

Smosh. One word that I use to describe my life. To me they aren't just two guys who oddball make videos and make me laugh. They are a philosophy. A way of life. They are a life changing experience of mine. They've created my second family which is an escape when I don't want to be with my real family cause they(my real family) don't get me like they(my smosher family) do. Smosh has given me the opportunity to be myself and not be afraid to show it. They've given me hope and happiness. I know them as people that are real, not just on my computer screen.

Let's go back in time to the year so long ago, no one remembers it: 2007.

I was a depresed child though I was only 9. I suffered anxiety and insecurities. My parents were facing financial troubles and such. I had to worry about stuff kids shouldn't have to worry about. I was living a horrified life. I always wanted to be noticed, but I was the kind of girl that was to quiet and shy to speak out or be loud. I kind of just agreed and went along with what everyone said. I tried going to psyciatrists and I couldn't connect with any of them. They all bored me and they just seemed like they were helping me to get paid. Which, of course, was the case with every one that I went to. I went to 3 different people. I trudged upstairs after a grueling hour long session. I was finally allowed to use Youtube. My parents wanted me to wait until I was 10 but they just let me. I hardley used it but I decided to numb my brain for the next twelve hours with boring cat videos. I checked the suggestions box. There was a long list: high cat, drunk cat, ninja cat, cat attacks watermelon, boxman, ca- whaaaaat? What's Boxman? I clicked to video and decided to watch it. I was laughing and enjoying myself. I began to watch the rest of the videos and I was smiling. I hadn't smiled without forcing it in a long time. I spent hours watching the videos and I was happier than ever. What were they called? Oh, Smosh. Cool name. I didn't speak of my love for the two funniest comedians I'd ever seen until eighth grade and it made me more social and helped me find people that I had a lot in common with. Not just cause they loved Smosh, but we had the same sense of humor and other kinds of stuff. It even opened up a world to other Youtubers and more friendships. Like my friend at school, Itzel. She's like a sister to me. I guess you can say that really DID change my life.

Ian. Anthony. You guys mean so much to me. Changing me from a depressed person to a very happy person means you really are something special. You guys matter to me more than a lot of things. You stopped me from being sad and stressed. You guys mean everything to me.

--Dahlia, A Truely Sincere Fan <3

Grecia

So, my name is Grecia Morales and I live in Mexico.

I started watching Smosh like... just 7 months ago and they are just my life.

Yes, I'm only 13 years old but my entire life are 2 men from Sacramento, California.

I know about them because a friend of mine show me the video 'POKEMON IN REAL LIFE' and I just LOVE IT. It was on October from 2011. So, when I went back home, I turn on my computer and wrote 'Smosh' on the Youtube search bar and I clicked to the video 'FIRETRUCK'. That was my second video, I can still remember that.

Then, I started watching every single video on their channel. Nobody in my family actually understood my obsession with them and once my mom forbade me watch another video on Youtube and then she took my computer and hide it on her room. I cried like... for 2 days.

I was so sad, and then, 3 days later it was my birthday, So, my mom gave me my computer back and she also gave me an iPod, and i was so excited because I could see the Smosh videos whenever I want to.

Later that day, I turn on the laptop and the first thing I opened on Google Chrome was Smosh.com and I started watching every video that i missed in those days.

I was so happy, and I started downloading every single video with extras and bloopers and now my iPod has 10gb of videos and all are from Smosh.

I also was so distracted at school, because, I was thinking in which video was going to be uploaded that day and all that smosher stuff. Smosh, they’ve changed my life in so many ways.

They are my heroes, my inspirations, and I hope someday I will meet them.

If someday, they come here, on this blog, and they read this... I just want to tell them THANK YOU. Thank you for being that missing part of my life that i was looking for. Thanks for making me smile everyday, even when I'm a little depressed or I'm just mad, a video from Smosh can make me happy with just 2 or 3 minutes. I love you guys so much. Thanks for being you. I just want to tell them that they are more important to me than my freaking life, they're so important to me that, I could die for them. Anyways, who would miss a stupid 13 year old girl?

Then, one day, I know I'm gonna meet them. Or maybe, I'm gonna talk to them on twitter or I don't know where, but before I die, I want to know that Smosh actually read something from me. Because... they are my life... How can you live without them!?

One day, I was depressed 'cause everyone on High School were telling me that I was crazy and that I'll never meet them. They literally told me "Stop dreaming. They will never even notice you" that day... It was on Friday. That day I think about run away, go to another place, not in my house, not in school. I just wanted to be free.

After recess, in my classroom, a new student came in, and her name was Katie. I don't wanted to talk to anybody, but she came with me and tell me "Hi, I'm Katie, and you?" I told her my name, I told her my story and then we both were talking about our hobbies. I realized that she was going to be my best friend when she said "I love Smosh. Do you know who are they?" I literally jump of happiness and told her ALL the things I love from Smosh.

Right now she's next to me. Watching every single word I'm writing. And she's smiling at me. We are the best friends in the world. Sometimes she call me Anthony and I call her Ian. We are just so equal and perfect for each other. I love her, she's awesome.

I love her with my heart. Because thanks to her, I have a person who doesn't think I'm crazy for loving 2 men from other country. Later that day that I met her, she came into my house and we watch "LEGEND OF ZELDA RAP" and we laughted so hard and we download the song to our iPods.

You know what? I don't care what people say. SMOSH IS MY DAMN LIFE AND NOBODY IS GONNA CHANGE THAT. YOU DON'T LIKE IT? GTFO.

Thanks Smosh. For making us smoshers SMILE everyday.

Also, thanks Brandi for making us realized that we are not alone. WE LOVE YOU!

Myra

Hi, my name is Myra. I am thirteen. Let me start from the beginning:

I was abused my whole childhood. My dad abused us, I had a friend who threatened to murder me, and I was molested when I was three. I remember always running to my room crying. My dad would threaten to hurt me a lot. Sometimes he did hit me. Sometimes he would hit my mom. I remember sitting on my bed reading, trying to drown out the noise of them fighting, but it was impossible. When my brother was born, he had the same problems. He was loud, violent, and mean. My entire family was a mess. One thing I remember was when my parents fought one night, and I began to cry. My dad asked me what was wrong and I told him I was afraid he and my mom would get a divorce. He told me, and I quote, "No, of course not. Our love for each other is strong." A year later my mother took us out of the house and we moved in temporarily with her co-worker. Then the divorce. It was long and complicated, I had to change schools, and leave my friends behind. My brother only progressed in his violence. He would threaten me with knifes. He cut my mom with a pizza cutter. I had to lock myself in my room in fear of my life. When I started seventh grade, I began with no friends. I knew no one. I was so scared to see my dad somewhere that rarely did anything. I was twelve and barely even knew what YouTube was. Then I found out my dad was moving to Canada, cutting off all therapy, making it impossible to see him again. I went through a horrible phase of depression and was suicidal. It didn't help that my brother had to be taken to a mental institute three times. At the beginning of eight grade I had my group of friends. We were the weird ones. Then as we were depressed one day (my friend and I) my other friend showed us a video called "Charlie the drunk guinea pig". We were hooked. I hadn't laughed or felt so truly happy in years. Ever since, I have been eagerly awaiting videos by two amazing men, Ian and Anthony. I fell in immediate love. For the few minutes their videos lasted, it as happy. I could forget everything that ever happened to me. They've progressed do far from when I joined their family, and I'm proud to call myself a true Smosher. Ever since that day, I've been happy.

"You never know where life is going to take you, you never know where you're going to go, But you'll never be able to find out if you end it." ~ Shane Dawson

Kaz

When I was 7 (2007) my parents got devorced and my own mother abused me by hiding behind me while her and my dad fought I would constally go in my room and cry and then I snuck on the computer a new website Youtube was on the screen I searched around and I found some videos by someone named smosh I instatlly started laughing. I was hooked now I'm 12 in mesa haveing my dad spank me with a whip and I've tried to commit suicide many time but I'd watch a smosh video and I would stop what I'm doing me and my 3 friends love you and so do I my only dream is to meet you Ian and Anthony I love you so much if you read this please tweet me @kaziluvssmosh it would mean the world to me